Bon Voyage my friend.

I received word earlier that my friend Mark who was also my editor for my books has left this plane of existence and gone on a new voyage to explore that which lies on the other side.  Mark was a wonderful, loving, giving man who will be missed by many. 

Mark and I both loved to laugh and we had many a hilarious conversation laughing and giggling about many a thing that caught our attention.  I know for a fact that we laughed so hard at times that both of us were left gasping. 

I am sure that his spirit of generosity and adventurousness will do him well on his exploration of the other world. We had discussed our idea of what we each thought lies on the other side of the veil, and I am sure that Mark is keen to check it all out.

I will miss him and his friendship, but wish him well as he sets out on his new journey.  Bon Voyage my friend!

The right way and the wrong way

Most of us have a general idea of right versus wrong.  What amazes me is when someone is totally out in outer space on what to them, constitutes the right way.  I am pretty open minded and understand that everyone has different ideas.  Be it marriage, or beginning or ending a relationship, most folks understand that honesty and trust is the foundation of a relationship.  So it is important when in one to have that.  Many a promising relationship has not gotten off the ground because one of the parties concerned has realized that the other person has lied or betrayed their trust, and many a marriage and relationships have ended because of the same.

Years ago I knew a lady who I will call Cecilia.  She and her husband Ralph had been married for 10 years.  They had met when she was working as a dancer in Nevada, and he had just gotten out of the service.  They were now in their mid thirties and had made several moves in location and changed careers.  Ralph was settling down into a more conservative life style and trying to get Cecilia to do the same.  She was a talented, free spirited type of lady and just wasn't happy with all the new plans and ideas that Ralph was wanting for both of them.  Ralph was insistent that Cecilia live life according to his plans and "grow up", she begin to get depressed and started over indulging in alcohol.  After one too many hang overs and a couple of screaming matches with Ralph, plus a book that a friend loaned her about happiness and being one's self, she decided it was time for some heavy duty thinking.

Ralph had pressured her to quit her job and be a full time wife.  She knew this did not make her happy.  She decided to indulge herself in gardening to help herself think.  She made a few new friends when she joined some clubs on gardening.  Meanwhile Ralph was living his life of conservative business man and all that that entailed.  Cecilia became friends with a man that was a few years older than she and would have coffee with him.  She realized that this man was easy going, and she was attracted to him.  She realized that she could be happy with a man of this nature, and that the life that Ralph had decided that they were going to live was not for her.  She went home, and told Ralph that she had decided that they had grown apart and no longer made each other happy.  She told him she wished him the best, but she was going to get a divorce.  After days of discussion Ralph realized it was true and they parted.  Cecilia after the divorce started dating the man she had become friends with, and Ralph went on to marry a woman he had met at work.  The last I heard everyone was doing well and being happy.  Cecilia went about things the right way.

Then there is the woman I will call Bertha.  Bertha and Harold had been married for about 8 years.  Bertha was a lady that had to be the center of attraction at all points.  Harold was working long hours to provide Bertha with the lifestyle that she let everyone know that she deserved.  Bertha would work at times, then get bored and quit.  She would go shopping and partying with her friends to occupy herself.  She was also upset that Harold was working so much.  While Bertha was out and about she ran into an old school friend ( we will call her Ethel) and her husband.  A flirtation that soon led to an affair occurred between Bertha and Ethel's husband.  Harold heard rumors about the affair and asked Bertha about it.  She denied it.  Harold took Bertha to Vegas for a vacation and when they got back, she handed him divorce papers and threw him out of the house.  Then she moved Ethel's soon to be ex-husband in.  Things didn't work out between them, and she tried to reconcile with Harold, who was having none of it.  The last I heard, Ethel was on husband number 5.  After being stalked by Ethel for over 2 years, Harold moved several states away, has a great job and has remarried.   Ethel did not go about things the right way, and she still can't understand why Harold wouldn't reconcile.  She blames his mother, his sisters, and everyone but herself.  She doesn't get it that she is the one who messed things up and she has no one to blame for the mess but herself.  She keeps saying she told him she was sorry, and that if he really loved her he would have made up.  Even when you tell her that she was the one who threw him out and filed for divorce, she will tell you that, that has nothing to do with it.  See what I mean, totally out there in space somewhere.

Some folks just don't get it.  I just shake my head and wonder if they ever will.